I Know You Want to Fit In {A Letter to My Childhood Self}

Dear 11-year-old Erin,

The world of girls is a tough one, isn’t it?

I know you want to have a crowd, your people, a place to fit in. And sometimes you feel like you’ve found it. You have friends with whom to walk to school, go to the mall, have sleepovers, write stories. Most of the time it’s fun. And it feels good to be accepted. I still like that feeling.

But what price are you paying to fit in?

I remember those days – that feeling of wanting to be able to say, “Me too!” when someone tells a story about a trip or a new outfit. I really do know why you are chiming in even when it’s not the truth. It feels good to have those girls smile in acknowledgment of your sameness as them.

There’s this truth that hasn’t taken hold in your heart and soul yet. You care more about belonging to the world than you do about finding your identity in the one You created you. You just don’t know the truth yet, but I want you to know it now…

And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? ~Mark 8:36

The lies you tell now to fit in may seem harmless, but they will be hard to shake as you grow older. Some lies will be found out, some will not, but all will affect your relationship with Jesus and your ability to share Him with the world.

I’m actually not writing to scold you today, but to encourage you that Jesus loves you more than any of those girls ever could. He smiles at you and takes you in even when you aren’t able to say, “Me, too!” He sees you at your lowest and has only grace and mercy and compassion. He is the greatest friend you will ever have. 

As I write this, my three boys are playing around me, and I’m praying they will always choose truth and Jesus when faced with the choice of pleasing the world or following Him. Jesus is using the experiences you are having right now to shape my prayers for the next generation and for that I am thankful.

I’ll wrap it up with this today…

When you don’t fell good enough, when you find yourself not fitting in, when you mess up and can’t find which way to go next, whatever may happen today or tomorrow or next week…

You belong to Jesus and with Him, you ALWAYS fit in.

Lots of love and hugs,

32-year-old Erin

What would you tell your childhood self right now?

*****

September is Blog Month for Compassion International. Bloggers all over the world are joining forces to share the heart and soul of Compassion and see 3,160 children sponsored in the month of September. It’s a big goal, but God like big, bold dreams like that, especially when they involve taking care of the “least of these,” doesn’t He? Take a moment to think of your childhood self and what you needed to hear, then hop over and pray over a few Compassion kids of that same age who are waiting for sponsors. Maybe He’ll lead you to do even more…